Weight. It is something that I have struggled with the majority (if not all) of my life. And it has been one hell of a JOURNEY. I have early memories in grade school where I felt differently than my peers because of the way I looked. I went to a private school and we all wore uniforms, and I always felt like I stood out in comparison to my classmates. My uniforms were big and long. It wasn’t till later on that I started having my uniforms hemmed so I blended in more.
When looking back, I sometimes feel sad that I spent so much of my childhood extremely self conscious. My low self esteem distracted me in school and I never seemed to perform up to my potential until later years. It’s pretty wild how much of an impact low self esteem has on one’s life and how those debilitating thoughts and lack of self love shape your trajectory. I don’t have any regrets, and know that I ended up right where I needed to in life, but sometimes I do have those “what if” thoughts. Like, what if I had all of the confidence and self love that I have today back then? How would my life have panned out differently?
I believe that the challenging experiences that I have in life are meant to be shared, because I know I’m not alone here. Women (and men) struggle with this a lot, and I am SO grateful that I am on the path of self love, and our world is beginning to fiercely accept ALL bodies and promote body positivity pretty openly and widely. It brings me peace knowing that my daughter will be brought up in a world that practices more self love and acceptance openly.
I could write a novel on body image and the struggles I’ve had, but for now, I’m gonna leave it with that. I’m still fighting the good fight, (gently) combating negative self talk around my shape and looks. The thing I must remember, and while it’s an overused phrase it carries truth—it’s what’s on the inside that truly counts. This body is a beautiful vessel that carries my heart and soul. It’s been through a lot, and has brought me far. I cannot imagine a better body than the one that I’ve been blessed with
Photo credit: Alyse Michelle Images